On the coldest day of the year, I am watching the snow come down. We are anticipating 6 to 10 inches of the white stuff along the lakeshore. Winters in Michigan need snow. In my growing up years, the 60s and 70s, we had great snowy winters which got me into cross country skiing. The snow got so deep you couldn’t walk in the woods, but with the skis it was amazing. The last few winters have been really lame so I am happy to see snow.  

As a homeowner in Michigan, I have a lawn mower and a snow blower. If you have those, unless you bought electric with extra batteries, you need gasoline to run them, and a can to store it in. Last year my old metal gas can was showing its age, and I thought it was time to invest in a new one.  

My first disappointment was no metal, only plastic gas cans, but that was only the beginning of troubles. I had heard rumors about the new gas cans being hard to operate, but being somewhat mechanically minded, I wondered how hard could it be to pour gas out of a gas can? I was soon to learn.  

I bought my can in the summer and the first time I tried to fill the lawn mower I got a lesson in government overreach. With my metal can, you stuck the spout into where the gas goes and you were good. With this new government regulated gas can, tipping and pouring were futile. I sat down and read the instructions. There was this lever that you had to push up and hold in place which allowed the gas to flow, then while holding this rather stiff lever up you lift the can and tip it to fill the tank on the mower. There is also a cap tethered to the spout, and it wants to cover the spout so if you’re not careful, the gas hits the cap and ends up on the ground not in the mower.  For some reason the flow is slow. Holding the lever while tipping the can and avoiding the cap on the tether I felt like I was playing the game of Twister, originally called Pretzel which was an apt description. A great game, but not if you just want to cut the grass.  

I had a small yard and so I didn’t need to fill the mower often. By the time I needed a refill I had totally forgotten the “easy” operating instructions. Once again, I sat down with the can and read the sticker on the side. Good thing I hadn’t peeled it off and thrown it away. I performed the pretzel maneuver and finally got the mower gassed up and off I went.  

My metal can always looked the same, a nice rectangle. Not so with the new regulated model. In warm weather it was fat and looks uncomfortable, like it should be burped, and in the cold it has a permanent pucker, like its sucking in its cheeks.  

In due time winter arrives and I need to fill the gas can for the snow season. In the summer I could just twist off the spout to fill the tank, winter is a different story.  The cap and spout assembly screws on with a ratchet feature, not sure why, but before you can unscrew the ratchet you have to pull down a tab to release the spout rachet assembly. When plastic is cold it doesn’t flex so the tab doesn’t want to pull down. This makes me think these cans are great for Florida, but I live in Winter Wonderland. Did no engineer take this into consideration?    

I decided to put the gas can on the landing inside the house to warm it up so I could push down the tab, unscrew the cap and fill the tank. Nothing safer than keeping a smelly gas can in your house but it beat holding a match to the plastic. When it warms up enough and I get it open, I drive the open gas can to the gas station. I’m not closing it again until I’ve been to the pump.    

I read that unleaded gas is not good for small engines, especially if the gas is made of corn.  I already put an additive in my gas can that is supposed to counteract the ethanol but then they tell me that it’s best to use recreational gas for your small engine. So, I head to the rec gas pump and there experience sticker shock. It’s almost $5 a gallon. After 30 years in the city, I moved back out to the county and opened my wallet for a country snow blower that can walk uphill in four speeds. It needs to last me, so I am willing to pay the price for the no ethanol gas.  

I fill my tank with the liquid gold and gingerly drive it home.  

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